I’ve been anxious for a long time about whether or not to make a “formal” post like this, as most of my community and those close to me already know/don’t care, but also because I feel some friends and family still don’t really “understand”... Just a reminder that I use she/they pronouns and identify as genderfluid. Some of you checked in when it popped up in my bio a couple years ago, but I mostly didn’t feel the need to explain or make a big statement. Since childhood I’ve said I feel I look like a boy sometimes, and feel incredibly dysphoric when folks respond with how feminine they perceive me as. But other times, embracing femininity feels like the most fun, or even a kind of drag. Nowadays for events like weddings where I feel expected to dress a certain way, I set it up in my mind as high camp, fully committing to a Y2K or ultra girly look, otherwise my anxiety and dysphoria make it hard to function. Some days, nothing feels good, as I would like to exist as an amorphous blob, not to be perceived in any way. It’s more than just feeling uncomfortable in clothes, it’s like I’m betraying myself and playing this lie out in the world to make others comfortable, or presenting a character they can understand. The truth is, non-binary/genderfluid folks don’t owe you androyny, masculinity, or femininity. We exist as ourselves and don’t need to follow a set of aesthetic rules to be valid. Having to choose one gender forever feels stifling and wrong to me, but maybe it feels awesome and right to you – cool! I hope we can all accept and respect each other for who we are, even when our realities differ. PS either pronoun is totally fine, please don’t ask me to choose one:)) Think of this as an expansion and affirmation of what’s always been there, rather than a change. 🖤 📷 @exposuresbytay