To be honest, existing online terrifies me when I think about it too much. I feel too exposed, too vulnerable. It's like I've voluntarily locked myself up in a panopticon, never quite knowing when I'm being observed and by whom. Growing up, I gravitated towards the arts as a medium to express myself and connect with the world, protected through the filter of storytelling. Even now, I often take on a character or persona in my work (eg. Lily Holiday) because the idea of offering myself up for public consumption, with all my dusty baggage, dark cobwebbed corners, and broken windows, feels like one of those nightmares where you realise you're standing naked in front of an auditorium full of people. I'm still a bit of a lost traveller in my offline life, trying to figure out who I am, what I want, and where I fit in. As much as I try not to, I care too much about how I am perceived and the desire to exercise control over my narrative often creates paralysing anxiety around creating and posting content. The contradiction of wanting to be seen and not looked at is at the heart of my struggle with social media. All this to say, I want to attempt a more consistent presence by creating content of value for my audience so if there's anything you've been wanting to see from me, I'd love to know! Aside from my own creative projects, I think producing purposeful content I know will benefit those watching might help mitigate how self-indulgent social media can feel. Feel to leave your ideas in the comments or DM me 💌 Makeup by @florasis.official Playing around with dried flowers inspired by @hannnasofiaa (one of my favourite visual artists on this platform - do yourself a favour and check out her ethereal self-portraits ✨)