.we had been discussing my installation @frickpgh, Reckoning: Grief and Light. And the interviewer asks me, “so, ok, the grief is there... what about the light?” And i have been thinking about this. And thinking about how I was giving a gallery tour of ==sad rapper== and one of the questioners asked me about, “getting past” the pain/ grief of a thing. And I felt something like a tiny shriek of shame streak up my legs when the questioner said, “get past it” and the interviewer asked me, “what about the light?” . Felt like i was supposed to be saying: there is healing after this and it is perfect and clean as brand new as new water. There is awakening into a new body, into a new mind, and alla of the scars have smoothed themselves seamless— go forth and be unburdened and *unburdening* with your sorrow/grief/pain. . What I am coming into is the way that the grief and the light are right there on the same spot that love built. They have defied the law of physics that tell us that two things cannot occupy the same space at the same time— grief and light do. They are right here, right now and they mourn and sing in harmony. Without one there is not the other. So. This is a place of integration and intention. How shall we move our bodies forth knowing of this sea of weighted, luminous blues becoming gold becoming blue becoming gold? How shall i love myself more tenderly in this room of occupied territory? How shall i enter more and more into the loving that is the yes of being alive in my wholeness? . I am a complicated lover. I want to wear it all around my neck all of the time. . Tuesday afternoon thoughts and ==sad rapper== is open @kasmingallery through to October 22. . Thank you to all who’ve come in. Thank you for your notes, I read them all. May the day have purpose and gentleness in equal measure. . #vanessagerman #griefandlight #reckoning #assemblage #figuringitout #sadrapper #integration #technologyofsoul