M E N T A L H E A L T H ➖ Three years ago, I tried to change all my life. I was sad with my body and my mind. Joking and doing stupide things were only illusions. When I was looking in the mirror, I was not seeing « the Cynthia in my head. » Like if this body was not mine but to someone else. I didn’t recognize myself anymore and between screams and tears: I decided to change. After a weight loss of 30-35kg, I still want to lose 5-10kg and they are the hardest... I tried other way to eat and except making me sad and starving me, it didn’t help. Today, when I look in the mirror, I see my old body; like three-four years ago and I can’t stop crying. Before I was saying to myself “10 minutes of sport are better than doing nothing - walking is better than metro - you can be proud of yourself you did more jumping jacks than one week ago - not losing weight is better than gaining weight.” Every time I could see the positive way but now, it’s complicated. @fizzup advised me to take measurements and pictures and our weight is not the only way to see a weight loss. Before I refused to be captured in picture; to me, it was not ‘me’ in those pictures and it’s still hard to me to look at them now but I need to help my brain to understand that this person is not me anymore. I tried to say to myself too, it’s ok to give in and eat stuff we like. It’s ok for being tired and won’t be able to do @fizzup every day... Like, it’s ok for not being thin and have your own body. We just need to find our real definition of happiness and if changing something on our body would REALLY be the best definition for this word. Society can be hard with people that they don’t meet the standards, but for me, difference is one of the most beautiful things I can appreciate and admire on people. Being ourselves and being happy with this way to live and think. Being true with ourselves and to others in a world surrounded by fake and image. Controlling our image today is super easy, but it doesn’t reflect our life and our way to feel. Taking a selfie with a huge smile on our face is sometimes easier than admitting all the ‘bad’ words running in our mind.