It’s your job to teach your child emotional regulation. Your child’s tears over small stuff is related to emotional control. The tears themselves should be thought of as neutral — there’s nothing either good or bad about them. Verbally acknowledge your child’s sadness or disappointment, but you don’t have to do anything. The parent doesn’t need to “fix” the problem by “giving in." You want to avoid a pattern where the parent changes their behavior because of crying. Your child can learn a response other than, or in addition to, crying. Validate her feelings, but remove the attention from crying. Focus instead on redirecting her behavior towards the goal, and ignore additional outbursts. Lavish praise for attempting or accomplishing the goal. Don’t do this: Say, “I’ll go to the store and buy the cereal bars you want,” and ignore her upset feelings. Try this instead: Say, “I’m sorry I didn’t buy the cereal bars you want and that you’re upset. You’ll have to find something in the pantry that works until the next time I go shopping.” If your child chooses another snack — even with some crying or whining — that’s success. So praise the action. Say, “I can tell that was hard for you, but I’m proud that you found something else you like.” Focus on the end goal and give attention to that, not the tears. Remember: Your child’s intense emotional reaction to a little disappointment isn’t necessarily tied to sadness; and it’s not a measure of her level of disappointment about the situation. #stopcryingdoesntcutit #parentssupportingparents #parenting #parentgoals #parentingtips #parentingadvice #mommin #nohoodlikemotherhood #goodparentingskills #betterparenting #parentsupport