the screaming bunny was born of a failed project i began in grad school. at the time, in 2018, it had significance relating to fugitive modes of distribution and solidarity; over time i curled inward and the object transformed into another voiceless visage. in annie ernaux's 2000 book Happening, she tries to make sense of her old journals–a kind of evidence–in order to process something unresolved in her past. my own Happening: a man who could walk on his hands for hours. the acrobatics of his logic. refusing testimony yet rammed with storytelling. weeping and clawing toward the viability of making History right. years of torn skin clogging the fingernails. the collective unconscious confers on us both the wisdom and demons of our forebears. ego, individuated, destroys; it also builds. sometimes ego is the only thing protecting you from annihilation by inheritance. for the first time i experienced a love that helped me learn to be in community with my ego: to negotiate with it, to heed its protective yelping, to banish it from the room. as a carver i destroy in order to create; as an addict i have a hard time stopping before loss of structural integrity. too much faith in a thing will also lead to its collapse. for the first time i walked away from a thing before i felt ready. maybe i left it standing. Happening 2018-2022 46 x 32 x 29 inches burned fabric, resin, steel, wood, angle grinder, beeswax, found textiles, epoxy clay, wire mesh, plaster, papier mache, light, horse hair, turtle shell “forgive everything” is on view at @nightgallery until january 21. 📷 Nik Massey