Skill and capacity are not the same thing. You can know exactly how you want to respond and still snap, shut down, or walk away. That isn’t failure. It is your nervous system telling you it is out of bandwidth. Kids experience this too. They know the rule. They know the routine. They often even want to do the right thing. But when their capacity drops, their brain cannot access the skills they have practiced. This is why “just be calm” or “use your words” doesn’t land in the heat of the moment. Regulation first. Teaching later. That is how skills take root. If you want to understand what drains or restores your capacity and your child’s, the Regulation Questionnaire is the best place to start. Comment REGULATE and I will send it your way. #bigkidsbiggerfeelings #nervoussystemregulation #childdevelopment #parentingishard #skillsvscapacity #emotioncoaching #seedandsew #gentleparenting #consciousparenting #parentingsupport #regulationfirst