So. I had one of those days when I woke up with imposter syndrome. Yeah, sure, everyone gets them. But that doesnt make it feel less discomforting. What am I doing here? Who am I trying to kid? And my mind starts going down that rabbit hole, I start to lose faith, confidence and peace. All things vital for a healthy day. I took a step back. Tried to breathe. Tried to process silently while trying not to disrupt too much of the day. Easier said than done. Extremely difficult for partners. Quiet can be hard to bear but I thought better not to say things when not ready because you cannot unsay what you say. But we kept the air gentle and unaccusatory, with adequate safe distancing haha. That night, I checked in with old dear friends, people i have deep history with. To remind myself who I am, where I came from and why I am where I am. Next day, a check in with my counsellor (I cannot recommend this enough, especially when nothing big is going wrong!), a sort of me-day doing a bit of work on set, where I know I have earned respect and affection on my own merits. I needed to feel that. By the end of the day, I found my way back. Re-centered. Steady heartbeat. Relaxed breath. To a patient and supportive partner, waiting for me at home, ready to have leftover chicken wings for dinner. We debriefed. Softly. Lovingly. Honestly. And all was good. Again. Tomorrow is a brand new day. Be better, Kheng, be better. 📷 @bootneck_45