Well, it’s obviously not the most high quality reel I’ve ever posted, but 🤷🏻‍♀️ It hit me again how much I’ve changed in the last couple of years. Being raised and married in a high control religion with a strong emphasis on purity culture, distrust of the self, chronic gaslighting of anyone who didn’t share the same beliefs, and *shame* made me feel as though I was never at home in my own body. The first couple of selfies I posted (fully clothed I’ll add 😂) gave me such high anxiety I had to turn my phone off for several hours. But I had taken the time. And I had done the work. And I knew what was important to me. Now here I am posting a reel of me practicing my posing just for fun. I can’t tell you... I wouldn’t have even been able to do this without a camera capturing it before. It was incredibly helpful to follow women who unapologetically showcased themselves in the ways they chose (I’ve tagged a couple of them below ☺️). I could see the freedom in it and I knew that it was inside me too. I just needed many calculated steps to get there. I never set out to change my body - and even though it has significantly changed in the last couple of years - I set out to love it... well, to accept it and be at home in it. But I do want to be clear that my body confidence didn’t come from inhabiting a smaller body. My specific and unique circumstances led to my body changing because I learned to love it the way it was. While I typically run into very positive feedback for my account, I know I originated from a community where there would be little to no positive feedback for it. Labels of pride, vanity, deceit, self-loathing (isn’t that ironic?), desperation, a need to prove something to others... those are the labels I am familiar with in this context. But oh, now... now I realize that “they” - anyone really - can label me how they like. Just as I can label anyone according to my perceptions. It means very little. What does matter is what I think and feel about myself. And dear god, it feels good to be at home. ❤️ If you want to fill your feed with more inspiring women, check out: @msstephyreid @robynhatesolives @okt_xo @_samfallon @carefreecolbs