Earlier this week we attended the anatomy scan (aka the 20-week ultrasound) of our future child. We began this process in early 2021, interviewing other gay dads, then exploring fertility clinics and surrogacy agencies across the U.S. Every step—from selecting an egg donor to making embryos, finding a surrogate (for those unfamiliar with the process, she is different than the egg donor), and then getting pregnant—presented challenges. We are far enough along that we feel comfortable sharing the news. Not for congratulations, but for advice and guidance and patience in the coming months and years. In the most challenging moments of our relationship, we were unified by the idea that we wanted to be (gay) dads—together. We found out that our surrogate was pregnant in February. It’s been both a relief and, to be honest, terrifying. We want to take a moment to thank every gay dad who walked us through the process, talked us through the disappointments, quieted our fears, and (especially those who) shared spreadsheets (seriously). We also need to thank all our women friends who opened up about their IVF experiences. It’s been helpful beyond belief. Here are some photos we haven’t shared from our Iceland wedding on May 26, 2018.