Dear 49 is close to 50, Happy Birthday! In our new world of putting candles on a cupcake to avoid blowing covid on the cake - we hope your birthday wishes come true. Now for your questions... Are you really getting older and owning it? Let us start with the easy part - it gets us 50% there. You are getting older. We all are. When I was 28 I dated a 35 year-old and he, to the joy of my friends, was OLD. Like pleats in his light colored jeans, tape deck in his car, old. Older is all relative. At 49, you’re a spring chicken to a 75 year old. To a 12 year old, you’re ancient. This is, as they say, what it is. The age train moves forward, the stop numbers go up. On hard days, we focus on the fact that we still have a seat on the train. How lucky are we to still be here to have our thighs stick to the seats on a hot summer day? With a big window and a ticket and ideally a sleeper cabin to share with someone who's washed their socks. Next stop... Are you really owning it? You, of course, know this best. Deep in the crevices of your gut or in the pro and con decision lists you make. We will say this, our society has whacky ideas of what it means to get older that involve a lot of beige and smiling couples sailing off into the sunset. Owning it is as much about worrying about your parent with Alzheimers as it is about the swagger you feel when you conquer something new. Owning it can be asking for help, sharing that shit is hard or sitting in peaceful silence. Hell it can be sailing into the sunset wearing all beige. If age has taught us anything it’s that we are all many things - at once. We are shmorgasboards of complicated awesomeness. We’re “ands” not “either / ors.” Picking what you want to most own is up to you. Surrounding yourself with people who reinforce what you choose strikes us as key to the magic. Do what makes you feel it fully. Even if it’s snack size. Would you look good in those readers? Hell yes. Though, we’re biased. If you feel good in them it’s a win. Onward 49. If you're still reading, have a great new year. Thanks for writing in. Love, Caddis / Humongous Living