She thought the feelings of depression were normal... A few months ago, I was talking to one of my clients on a check-in about what she had been dealing with the past few weeks, discovering that she had depression and how hard that had been. I asked her if she ever had felt the feelings of depression that led to her diagnosis before, and she said yes, she could remember times she’d felt that way in the past, but she didn’t know that it was “abnormal” at the time, so she just thought that was “how she was.” I related... I remember the first time I heard about anxiety from a friend, and being so confused what she was talking about when she described having it. Except after that conversation, I soon started recognizing the feeling in myself... All. The. Time. Before having the words for it, I just thought the anxiety was a given part of who I was — someone who felt a gripping in their chest when they thought about the future, or about being alone, or about trying anything outside my comfort zone. My norm was constantly seeking things outside myself to make me feel good, Another cup of coffee, A party, A person, Things to get me through the day or to give me something to look forward to, because going internal meant sitting with the discomfort that came with going through the day to day knowing I wasn’t fulfilled, that I had no idea what fulfillment for me even looked like, and the fear that I would never figure it out. And yet, instead of seeing this perpetual discomfort as a signal from my body that I was suffering, I thought “I’m fine.” When you’re used to functioning with (and suppressing) that level of discomfort on a day to day basis and thinking that it’s fine for you, you also think that’s truly all there is. It’s not. Change is possible. Knowledge is penicillin, and all change starts with gaining awareness. You are worth the effort 🤍