In the latest #HolaPapi, @jpbrammer answers a woman who knows there are plenty of fish in the sea, but is scared to dip moore than a toe in the water: “I was ghosted by my boyfriend of over a year at a time when my life was already going down the drain. I had recently been fired, learned I had to return to my country, and lost my grandfather. After that, my heart basically decided to close up for good. Things picked up a bit. I moved to Europe and got a good job. But my heart is still clamped shut. I’m terrified of going on second or third dates with someone, and I haven’t done it in the past eight years. On my low days, I tell myself it’s because of a physical flaw — like my teeth not being aligned. On my good days, I say, “Screw ’em if they don’t want me.” Through it all, though, I’ve been lonely. Lately, I’ve been so hyperaware of being single that it’s getting in the way of other thoughts. The tape is always playing. What on earth is wrong with my heart and my head? It’s not like I don’t want companionship. I ache for it. But I don’t seem to know the first thing about how to look for it.” Tap the link in bio for Brammer's answers and advice. Illustration by @pedronekoi