Wow, what a difference a year makes! 🥹 I would say where has the time gone, but in many ways last year feels like a lifetime ago. We'd just come out of lockdowns, we'd just moved to Essex, and Alf wasn't even crawling yet! You can see just how much Alf has grown on a year, but what's less obvious is my own transformation. I feel like you can see the physical transformation - I'm not talking about the way I look as such, but more my confidence and happiness. I was a bit lost last year - wearing that dress that day felt like a rebellious act because I was sick of having to dress thinking about how breastfeeding friendly an outfit was. I was 10 months postpartum and I was still recovering from childbirth - the incontinence, the piles, the pain, the leaky boobs. I didn't feel good in my body because how could I when I felt broken? This was also when I started to enter the worse part of Postnatal depression. Not long after this video the lowness crept in. I'd not slept for months, I'd moved away from friends, Alf didn't take a bottle and so feeding was still on me at night - I felt trapped and as much as I loved Alf I hated parenthood. It felt like a terrible mistake because I was so happy the way things were before it. But 365 days later, I feel great. I love my body (although I'm not sure the piles will ever leave!), I love being a mum - don't get me wrong there are shit parts of it that I wish people felt comfortable sharing more about! Like the juggle and the exhaustion even when they do eventually sleep through. But I'm happy. And I'm excited. I suppose I'm sharing this because motherhood can be so sugarcoated. Or mums who are struggling are so often dismissed because people don't like to hear a non romantic version. But mainly, to say that if you are struggling - it gets so fun. Hold in there. I can't wait to recreate this every single year. ❤️ Brown Dress and boots are @allsaints 🍂