Dr. Dan Siegel coined the phrase “name it to tame it” as a way of describing how to help a child calm down. Describing what is happening and how the child might be feeling helps them process their emotions and begin to calm down. 🙌⁣⁣ ⁣⁣ When you do this, your toddler sees that you believe the feelings they’re having, even if those feelings are frustrating to you at that moment. ⁣⁣ ⁣ Children need reassurance that a range of feelings is normal, and that emotions come and go. It’s knowing how to respond to our emotions that’s so critical, especially as we get older. 👍⁣⁣ Here’s how you can “name it to tame it”: ⁣⁣ ⁣ ➡️ Try to accept all of your toddler’s feelings. Even when you don’t accept the behaviour. ⁣⁣ ⁣⁣ An example is: If your toddler really wants something at the store and starts screaming, you can name it to tame it by saying, “I can see that you really want that toy—it looks like it would be so fun to play with, doesn’t it? We’re not going to buy it today, and I can tell that upsets you.” If your toddler calms down a bit, you can move along by offering an opportunity to switch gears: “Should we walk or skip to the car?” or “Would you like to hold hands or link elbows?” 😀⁣⁣ ⁣⁣ They may, however, still be mid-tantrum and unable to hear much of what you’re saying. In this case, consider saying very little (“I know you’re upset”) while offering a hug if they’re ready for one. Take some deep, intentional breaths, and eventually they MIGHT calm down. And other times, they will absolutely not. ⁣⁣ ⁣⁣ ➡️ Connect to past challenges. ⁣⁣ Telling the story back to your toddler later on can be reassuring. By reminding them of their own resilience, you are reassuring your toddler that they worked their way through a tough time and now they’re okay. 👌 Use details to remind them of the experience and don’t shy away from using more complex words like “frustrated”, “disappointed”, and “anxious”. ⁣⁣ ⁣⁣ Retelling a negative experience can feel counterintuitive, but it actually helps toddlers connect the parts of the brain they use for emotion with the parts they use for reasoning. #LoveveryEurope #LoveveryToddler #ToddlerEmotions #Tantrums #SocialEmotionalDevelopment