Took the day off work to turn 28 with all my friends and an esthetician named Jodi with a silk-soft voice who rubbed honey all over my face and said “thank you” to ME when she was done. Had a French omelette next to Alana Haim and took notes on every single thing she said in the margins of the New Yorker crossword (she referred to her wig in One Battle etc as a “fuck ass bob”) and came home to cook chicken thighs in a new striped skirt. Had chocolate cake on plates that look like soccer balls. Spilled a little red wine on my new striped skirt. Woke up today with a sink full of forks covered in chocolate frosting. Thank you.