the last 8 months of touring have been phenomenal. i want to find a quiet room, cocoon for some time and process the moments and memories you’ve given me. i was really afraid when this tour began. afraid that after all the time i spent battling depression and anxiety over the last few years, the gruelling nature of touring might push me back into the darkness again. and although i am exhausted, i can happily say the depression hasn’t returned- and whoa what a difference it is to tour without it. on other tours i was so unwell and numb, i couldn’t feel your energy. there was a fortress of walls up around my heart. i couldn’t look into your eyes as i performed because i was afraid if we held each other’s gaze too long, you might see my self-disgust and run. but by the time may 2022 rolled around, the walls had crumbled. i felt luminous. i could look into your eyes and connect with you. feel your pain and joy light up any room we were in- and this has been the gift of a lifetime. thank you for blessing me with it. it’s a gift that i’m sure will inspire a lot of writing about hope. about resilience. about togetherness. about community and our ability to not just survive- but thrive. mexico city, brazil, australia, new zealand, singapore, you’re next! (link in bio for tickets). until then- i look forward to spending the holidays doing exactly what this poem says: being still with the woman i am right now- and enjoying her before she evolves into the next iteration ❤️ thank you for walking this road with me. i love y’all so much ❤️