Man is it hard to smile in these times. I feel like even for these birthday photos it was tough to not drop the forced smile while all the sadness rushed to the front of my heart and brain. If you’ve been following along, you know what I’m talking about and why I’m fighting sadness daily. This year I promised myself that this would be my best birthday yet since my childhood bestfriend took her life a bit ago. I planned to travel and do a bachelorette themed birthday since I also didn’t have a bachelorette party when I had gotten married. I had so many plans and healing redemptions awaiting this birthday. But very quickly my whole world stopped when someone so close to me was rushed to the ICU. I patiently waited with hope in my heart that we would make it past this & I would be helping take care of her as she recovered. Broken hearted, I stand here saying; that didn’t happen. My Evie had passed & I spent my birthday week at her candle light location, her funeral, her burial, & her grave. This is not how I planned it. This has been a battle between a broken heart and a full heart for my Evie that passed, but my loved ones trying to make my birthday something joyful. I have very few encouraging words this year/this post other than make everyday count. Love hard, live fully, and never spend too much time upset, it’s not worth it. Never take life so hard. You deserve to enjoy, smile, and be positive no matter what happens. Make the most of the time you have here on earth, some people didn’t get to make it to the day you’ve made it to. This birthday has been one of the hardest of my entire life, but I thank you all for your kind words, and kind gestures in this time. Everyday is a restart, but I am doing my best to be normal and back in the swing of things. Thank you guys for your love and support 💞