2023 was supposed to be the year I faced my fears, chased after my dreams, and finally got back to the life I thought I was supposed to live in 2020. But this year ended up being exactly what it was supposed to be. This year, I finally spent time with myself. I put everything else on hold and looked myself in the mirror, asking myself questions that I remember asking when I was a kid. I faced fears I didn’t know I had, and I did chase after something – me. I donated my eggs back in 2021 and 2022. It was the most rewarding thing I have ever done, but it taught me to pay attention to the one thing I was ignoring my entire life. My brain and my body were very disconnected. I noticed how much impact on my mental health it took the more I leaned into womanhood. I blamed the hormones and PMSing, but I could only do that for so long. I could joke about being a boy in high school, told my best friend I would definitely wear a suit to her wedding, while desperately wishing I had worn one to prom. Seeking validation is so much easier. Trust me, I still find myself searching for it these days. But today, the only validation I’ve craved is my own. What do I want to wear? What haircut do I want? Which parts of my body have I glorified for the male gaze, and which parts do I actually feel connected with? I am trans and don’t fit within the binary. It’s really as simple as that. I don’t believe in coming out anymore (for myself). It takes a lot of courage, and I hope others still feel empowered to share their stories. But I do believe in creating visibility for those who may not have the words yet. For the longest time, that was me. I loved hearing coming out stories from trans people in my life and feeling connected to them in ways only my childhood brain could sense. All year long, I asked myself how I’d tell people, but I quickly realized that the more you take care of yourself, people will notice your growth and happiness and prove whether or not they deserve to be part of your journey. I still have dreams to travel, and I know that will happen soon. This body and I are going to go to a lot of places, but for now, I’m just glad it’s right here with me cheers to 24✨