As a parent to two little boys I need to talk about something for a minute. Or two. Just get it off my chest, ya know? Holiday edition. Every time the holidays approach, the flood gates open up and alllll of my anxiety pours in. Like buckle up, here we go - operation “keep your shit (and your kids) together in public” is underway. I’m always so complexed. For some reason I seriously struggle with the personal loss of what holidays used to look like for me, yet find myself falling in love with the experiences and traditions that I’m now able to give my own babies. It can’t be just me missing the way things used to be!? 🥹 Instead of being fully present with my family members, being able to eat my meals warm (and in the sitting position) - I’m focused on avoiding meltdowns, changing diapers, chasing babies around the house, trying to reason with toddlers and making sure everyone is all good. Family meals? Let’s not even go there. I sometimes feel shame and guilt over these feelings but then realize I am human and I just need to give myself some time and grace with loss and change. I’ve never been great with that. It’s the last day of the holidays before back to normal routine and this Easter definitely took a toll on us. These boys (and Mama) have had a pretty tough go the last few days. 24 hours, specifically. (Still coming down from their sugar rush and expecting all the ‘yes okay it’s Easter...” responses). OBVIOUSLY when you choose to be a parent, you give up and sacrifice so much of your personal experiences to get through certain seasons of life and kids. I do get that. I also know these moments and experiences that I miss during holidays will be re-introduced into my life (with time) as the boys get older. I also get that it probably won’t ever look the same for me, but that’s what makes certain seasons of my past and present so beautiful — nothing lasts forever. So, to sum it up... If you’ve cried more than you may have laughed this holiday season or had a meltdown a few more times than you had hoped for — it’s ok. You’re not alone and this parenthood thing is hard. #parenthoodbelike #parenthoodstruggles #holidayswithkids #parenthoodishard #toddlermomlife