All week long, I was pretending that I time traveled back to this trip. To be with and experience Sev as who he is right now. To remember what a family of 3 felt like. I took note of every funny quote and frequent catchphrase. I tried to memorize how his small hands felt in mine. I held him as much as I possibly could, aware that he’ll outgrow me someday sooner than I realize. We read the same books over and over. We went searching for mowgli and the grinch in the jungle. We chased the tides and let it catch us a few times. I balanced living in the moment, while simultaneously grasping as hard as I could. “Remember this. Remember this. Remember this.” The last 5 years have been filled with change, and this little boy has been my constant guiding light, my grounding force. There is bitter sweetness, knowing more change is coming. But 20 years from now, I’ll close my eyes and flashback to our family trip to Hawaii, right before baby brother was born. And I’ll remember 🩵