cw: top surgery. . . One year ago, I walked into a hospital in the very early morning to have my breasts removed. It was terrifying to ask those who weren’t romantic partners or family to show up when I needed them most—I was sure only a few wouldn’t be daunted. What happened instead: a good friend came from Yonkers to sit with me that morning, then wait for me. The next day, she and another friend came and picked me up. My fridge overflowed with food, I experienced two weeks of nonstop care and company, a Hermione Granger marathon, and the surprising opportunity to witness my social circles intersecting and getting to know each other. It’s so easy to commodify and to be commodified via identity nowadays—that’s something I actively resist. Commodities aren’t allowed ambivalence or fear—of the physical outcome of surgery; of not having a community; of giving one’s body to a stranger, even if that stranger is a medical professional. But this post is for another trans person who needs to hear it: it’s possible and wonderful to transition medically without partners or biological family. To know what love I have because I asked for it—there may be greater gifts I’ve yet to receive in life, but that seems a pretty big one. Thank you. You know who you are. #transman #topsurgery #asiantrans