Like most people, I wasn’t taught emotional regulation as a child. It wasn’t until I was about to have my first daughter that I decided that something needed to change. I couldn’t continue to have child-like outbursts because I didn’t know how to express what I was feeling in a healthy, mature way. I’ve been on a journey for 5+ years to find how to best respond to the emotional needs of my body. In the beginning stages, I couldn’t even NAME the feeling I was feeling. I remember a therapist asking what I was feeling and the only thing I could come up with was, “Okay... something isn’t right, but I feel okay.” and that’s not even mentioning how much harder it is when you also have kids because emotions come and go a lot faster than when it was just me. Instead of suppressing feelings or lashing out/projecting, I’ve found that simply approaching every emotion that arises with curiosity is the my favorite route.

Something like – “Oh interesting - today I feel a lot of built up anger. I wonder where this is coming from” and I work on understanding, expressing and/or moving through whatever emotion it is from there. Now as we’re exiting the toddler stage with my two daughters, I’m reflecting and realizing just how important this work is. I see how much more capable they are of regulating themselves at ages 3 and 5 than I was at age 20. I see how loud they are about what feelings they are experiencing and what they need. It’s definitely a practice and some days are better than others – but my only hope is that all of this work is laying the foundation for them to regulate as adults and hopefully skip this long detour I’ve had to take – no suppressing, projecting or lashing out on others. THEY ARE MY WHY.🤍 #gentleparenting #momtok #toddlermom #emotionalregulation #respectfulparenting #consciousparenting