Cancer Update #1 My first PET scan! For this scan you go through a machine similar to a CAT scan. An hour before you go in they inject you with a radioactive dye. The dye gets absorbed by all the tumors and makes them light up on so they can be visible. This scan is how my stage changed to Stage 4 with new tumors showing up in my spleen, abdomen, chest, pelvis and leg bones. It’s been super hard to process but everyday I’m feeling a bit better about it and have some great treatment options to choose from. During this time it’s really important that I keep my mental health strong. One of my biggest fears is loosing myself and the thing I love the most — my organizing work. The people, the strength, the resilience of gathering together. It’s fills me with joy unlike anything else. One of the first things my oncologist told me ( my specialized cancer doctor) is that she wants to help me remain the most “me” possible. Cancer takes so much away from you so incredibly quickly. One thing I’ve heard from friends who are survivors is to find ways that you can still find joy and take back some of that control from Cancer. A bit ago I did a small speaking engagement via zoom. I was so nervous. But afterward I felt better and more like myself than I had since being diagnosed. It made me feel strong and energized... two things that are going to be essential to help me beat this. Now to be completely real, I’ll most likely be only able to do 2% of what I did before. But right now that 2% feels like 10000% and brings me joy. Most days will still consist of me getting ready to go between my bed and my couch, going to appointments everyday, trying to eat what I can stomach, healing my bruised arms from all the blood draws, an overflowing inbox with things I probably won’t get to or won’t be able to do, and a WHOLE lot of sleeping. I have Stage Four Hodgkins Lymphoma. I’m tired and sometimes scared. And for awhile this fight is gonna take all my focus and energy. Doing small things here and there isn’t saying that I’m any less sick, but actually a huge part of fighting back I’m still Daphne and I won’t let cancer take that away from me.