Gratitude, Illness, Healing, 1st Gen 안녕, it’s been a while. I have been feeling unwell for some time now. Mental and physical fatigue. I always have a lot on my mind that I don’t usually share (as do a lot of us). I realized that a lot of my worth comes from productivity and constantly giving. I feel anxious when I’m not doing anything “productive,” and not allowing myself to rest or receive help. I feel like a lot of us experience this because we are constantly in a state of stress and fear. (the fear of not making / being able to provide for ourselves / for our families) Although we may feel ill, I still have hope that things are working out for us. Maybe we are ill because we are breaking free from past paradigms. Shedding old skin can be painful, as there are many layers of conditioning left to unpeel. We spent our whole lives chasing after the careers that we thought would make us feel worthy, instead of doing things that make us feel good because we are worthy. What are our values? Even after finishing undergrad, finding a new job and getting signed to an agency, I realize that I find myself drained and still searching for a “better” job. I am proud of myself for everything I have accomplished but, I see that traumatized girl that still lingers, and she keeps me from feeling whole and grateful. I share my vulnerability publicly in hopes to continue to show the world that Life is not perfect. It’s genuinely healing for me to share my struggles with you all. Please take care of yourselves and rest as I am learning how to rest. Thank you for holding space. The Journey Continues ~ Take Care ~