It’s dinnertime, everyone’s exhausted, and your kid’s still using the iPad after you’ve asked them to put it away. You ask them again, and wait — am I talking to a wall or my child? Why do they never listen the first time?! OK, hear us out – how many times have you said something like this: “If you don’t put your shoes on, we’re not going to school.” <kid refuses shoes, still goes to school> "If you don’t stop screaming, we are going to land this airplane. No more Disneyland if you don’t stop screaming.” <airplane doesn’t land mid flight, we still go to Disneyland> “Stop splashing the water or we’re getting out of the tub. I said stop splashing or we’re getting out of the tub. I mean it this time! Stop splashing!” What’s the common denominator here? We’re not *meaning* what we say. Sure, it might seem obvious to us that we’re not ACTUALLY going to land the plane, but toddler brains are still developing.🧠 They’re still figuring out cause & effect & how the world works. These types of “threats” hold weight to them. “Dad says no more iPad? Well, he also said he was going to land the plane last week, and that didn’t happen. So does he really mean it this time?” And in scenarios like the bath splashing, if we beg, plead, & negotiate rather than swoop in with the boundary, a thought pattern starts to develop: “Hey, if I just ignore mom/dad, I’m going to get 10 more mins splashing!” So, how do we get them to listen the first time? ✨MEAN WHAT WE SAY.✨ How? Hold firm, calm, consistent, confident, swift boundaries the first time, every time. 💯 This sounds like: “When you splash in the tub, it tells me you’re all done. It looks like you're having a hard time. I'm taking you out. It's ok to be sad about that." “Time to leave the park. I know it’s hard to leave the park, I'm going to hold your hand/pick you up to help you leave now." When we follow through with the boundary quickly, every time, our toddlers will learn that we mean what we say, so we’ll see MORE listening & LESS tantrums over time.🎉. #biglittlefeelings #resilientkids #toddlerlife #tantrums #parenting101