“Your anxious thoughts are lying to you” I don’t know exactly how long I’ve had ‘anxiety’ but my first anxiety attack was during my clinical rotations in Oklahoma City. I distinctly remember getting sick in the bathroom, leaving early, gasping for air on my way to my car, and sobbing uncontrollably on the phone with @conner5combs and @deesummers1 telling them I wanted to quit. I felt like I wasn’t cut out for the emotionally trying field and like my supervisor didn’t believe in me either. I wanted to quit something I had applied to 10 practicums, 20+ internship rotations, and moved to a city where I knew no one for, although I had a mere month left of the program. Fast forward a year and a half, I had been on anxiety medication for a year yet had my second anxiety attack. This time, I was in Bangkok, Thailand unable to be with family or anyone that really truly knew my heart. I’m still forever grateful for @francesca.hung, @yuumi_kato, and @ggallanagh who helped me get through the worst day of my life...which also happened to be the same day I interviewed for the biggest job opportunity of my life and walked the Miss Universe stage. (How ridiculous is it? Its actually quite comical, we were in Bangkok for 2 weeks, yet all of my preliminary completions were in one day, which just so happened to be 24+ hours after an Instagram live had disappeared forever but various clips were dubbed together and on international news that made me seem like a racist, malicious person, when in reality I was expressing genuine empathy that was perceived as sarcasm and hate). What does that have to do with me finally sharing my anxiety journey with you? Both times I endured my volcanic anxiety attacks, stemmed from lies. Lies to myself and lies from others about my identity. Whether you’re a focus of cancel culture on an international level or feel at war with your teacher/boss - don’t let these feelings impact your identity because our identities are not determined by fleeting emotions or opinions of others. We are children of the One True King and He calls us beloved (Romans 9:25).