how to spot your shadow - questions via @tobemagnetic * When have I been unlovable in the past? I thought myself to be unlovable when I’d act against the wishes of others. When I’d throw tantrums because I wasn’t getting what I wanted, whenever I expressed deep intense emotion and others seemed to recoil. When I’ve been harsh, to those around me in seeking what I needed for myself * Am I being unlovable now? I wouldn’t say so. I’m no longer in the belief that I ever was, honestly. Loving myself has wholly brought me to deservingness and there is no way I could not be lovable, even if not acting in the way that others would prefer. * Ask others if they've ever experienced me being unlovable in the past My mother told me so a few weeks ago, that when I get depressed and shut off it ‘makes her not want to be around me’ and I know that with him it was the same — when the emotions become too intense for those around me they find it hard to love that side of me, perhaps because they don’t acknowledge it within themselves. * Why am I afraid to show up fully as myself? I’ve been afraid all this time that showing up fully as myself would result in me being alone — That all these huge emotions wouldn’t be received by anyone, and that no one would want to or could love me. If I pretended to be fine, then someone surfaced could come in, we’d make a show of it, and I’d probably end up destructing because I’m not made for that. I’m only made for truth. And I’ve been afraid that truth would equate to loneliness and misunderstanding, as it often seemed to