a birthday stream of consciousness: nothing feels worse than knowing that you’re on the verge of a mental/emotional breakdown but you never feel the release from it because you’re auto-piloting and high functioning your way through everyday life. i’ve been questioning ehhhhhhhverythinggggg. existing is a lot. A LOT. being a present body in present time is a lot. happiness and sadness coexist in the weirdest reality. i saw “everything everywhere all at once” and couldn’t stop thinking about how it’s basically the live action version of “turning red”. i cried a lot during both of those films. also, after the whole oscar’s baffoonery, i got realllllllly self conscious about my bald head lol. that has nothing to do with either of those movies. but anyways... my anxiety is like that feeling of when you have to turn off the basement lights at the bottom of the stairs and the creepy monster that hides in the dark chases you as you run up to the next lit room. i’ve had my aura photographed for 4 years now and this new phase is teaching/showing me things i should be more aware of. seeing the change every year makes me emotional. i turned 28 yesterday so you know what that means? almost 30 lol. (swipe for 2021, 2020, 2019)