*TRIGGER WARNING* We don’t have a pregnancy yet. I just wanted to share my journey so far as it has been a heavy one and to also offer some peace to anyone going through similar things and find people who are experiencing similar feelings and emotions to myself also Lewis’s reaction was too adorable for me not to share. Since November 2021 we have been on this fertility journey and I shared with you all our miscarriage and honestly it was just so heart warming, it made my heart smile so much to see how much support and love I was shown. We are still waiting for our rainbow baby and I’m in such weird mind frame right now thinking I should have a baby that should be 2 days old today. Some days are so hard, and my due dates are my should have beens, we’ve continued on this journey still with no luck but trying to stay super positive, it’s exhausting to be honest, and mentally draining, I feel like a wake up some days and wear a mask so I’m able to go outside. I’m so lucky I have Lewis and my friends who I’m able to speak to about my feelings, they don’t tell me I’m silly, or its okay, or it will happen when you stop worrying. They respect my feelings and listen and don’t try and talk me out of them. I have found that to be so important and I’m so selective who I share my darkest thoughts with, to allow me to do that because I don’t want to be talked out of it and I don’t want to not talk about it at all, I need to feel it and figure out how to move forward and right now I’m really trying. I’ve found multiple things in my life that have helped and lifestyle changes that have had such a positive impact on my mindset. I eat well, I practice self care, I cry, I laugh, I look forward to starting a family so much. I hold that fear of another loss, or nothing happening at all, but we want a baby. We try and be realistic about what can happen, but also optimistic and envision holding our little one someday. 🤍